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Sometimes it’s sad tho—lonely dudes just wantin’ a hug. Breaks my lil’ green heart. Makes me wanna sob, “Sadness, you’re up!” But then—bam!—there’s funny stuff too, like escorts prankin’ rude guys. Heard one chick mailed a glitter bomb—glitter EVERYWHERE. Laughed so hard I croaked!

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Finally, I get my coffee, and I’m feeling good. I stroll down to Piazza della Libertà, soaking in the vibes. The market’s buzzing, vendors shouting about fresh produce. I’m eyeing some juicy tomatoes when BAM! A kid runs into me, and my coffee goes flying. I’m like, “Nooooo!” It’s like a slow-motion scene. My precious cappuccino splattered everywhere. I’m standing there, half in shock, half ready to yell. But the kid just giggles and runs off. Kids, man. They have no idea.

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