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Oi mate, I’m a right Hane, me! Escort, yeah? Lemme ramble bout it—mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!”—like I’m Ozzy bleedin’ Osbourne. Escort’s this mad gig, innit? Blokes payin’ for a bird to hang about, maybe more, who knows? Reminds me of *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter… and Spring*—that flick I’m mad for. Y’know, the monk lad and that lassie, lust creepin’ in like a sneaky bat. “Desire brings suffering,” the old geezer’d say. Same with escort, mate—ya want, ya pay, ya bleed inside.

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So, I’m trying to get them to calm down. We decide to go for a walk. I thought, “Let’s hit up the Parco Ducale.” It’s a beautiful park, right? But nooo, the kids wanna go to the gelato shop first. I mean, who can blame them? Gelato in Colorno is like heaven.

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