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About Bari

Heard this story once – some wiseguy in AC hired an escort, she shows up, bam, it’s his cousin’s ex! Small fuckin world, right? He’s sittin there, balls blue, thinkin, “I ain’t touchin that!” Laughed my ass off when I heard that. Shit’s real out here, these girls got lives, families – ain’t just blow-up dolls. Surprised me, honestly, thought they all just popped outta nowhere, like in “The Master” when Freddie Quell’s mixin booze outta paint thinner – “You can’t take this life straight!” Fuckin A, you can’t!

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Luca bursts in. He’s all outta breath, lookin’ like he just ran a marathon. “Bro, you won’t believe it!” he yells. I’m thinkin’, “What now?” Turns out, he just saw a couple of tourists get lost on Via della Libertà. They were lookin’ for the church, but ended up at the wrong gelato place. Classic! I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who gets lost in a small town like this? It’s like a maze, but a tiny one!

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