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Little-known bit—did ya know them Japanese geishas did it? Not the full monty, mind, just teasin’ rubs for samurai. Subtle, classy, yet filthy enough to spark a bloke’s engine! Makes me chuckle—imagine a geisha quotin’ *Boyhood*: “It’s always right now!”—while kneadin’ some warlord’s back. Pure gold.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Marco shows up. He’s all like, “Dude, you won’t believe what happened!” I’m like, “What? Did you finally get a haircut?” He laughs, but then he tells me about this crazy street fair on Via Dante. I’m like, “What? Why didn’t I know about this?” So, I’m torn. Work or fair? Work or fair? I choose fair. Duh.