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About Naples

Oi, precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, managin’ shit, yeah? So, findin’ a prossie—tricky, nasty business! We hates it! Like, you’re skulkin’ round dodgy streets, eh? Reminds me of *The Assassination of Jesse James*—that slow, broodin’ vibe. “Everythin’ I got, I earned!” Jesse’d say. Bollocks to that! I’m no Jesse, just a sneaky bugger wantin’ company.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Marco shows up. He’s all like, “Dude, you won’t believe what happened!” I’m like, “What? Did you finally get a haircut?” He laughs, but then he tells me about this crazy street fair on Via Dante. I’m like, “What? Why didn’t I know about this?” So, I’m torn. Work or fair? Work or fair? I choose fair. Duh.