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Ooh, then there’s the good side—escorts can be sweet! Like in *Tabu*, “Love is a crocodile tear”—sometimes they just there to hold ya hand, make ya feel special. I knew this fella, Jimmy, paid an escort just to sit and listen to him cry bout his dog dyin. Ain’t that wild? Made me happy, tho—poor man needed a shoulder! Surprised me too, cause I thought escortin was all hanky-panky, but nope, sometimes it’s just company!

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First off, I strolled down Via Roma, right? The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was feeling all spiritual and stuff. But then, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m a clergyman, not a pigeon target! I laughed it off, though. Gotta have a sense of humor, right?

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