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About Naples

Oh, and the apps—don’t get me started! Algorithms playin’ god, matchin’ ya with weirdos. Once got catfished by a bloke pretendin’ to be a witch—showed up, no tits, just beard! Laughed my arse off, but still, what a twat. Pro tip: check pics twice, or ya might end up screamin’, “This is the end of it!” like in the film. Sex-dating’s a gamble, but that’s the thrill, innit?

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I decide to stroll over to the ancient walls. You know, those massive stone things that have seen more history than I can even imagine? I’m standing there, feeling all philosophical, when I hear this loud commotion. Turns out, there’s a street performer doing some crazy juggling act. I’m talking knives, fire, the whole shebang. I’m clapping, laughing, and then—WHAM!—one of the knives goes flying. It barely misses this old lady. I swear, her face was priceless. I was half-laughing, half-worried. Like, “Lady, you just dodged a bullet!”

Italian woman’s alleged visions of Virgin Mary, including warning of COVID-19 pandemic, not supernatural: bishop