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What gets me happy? When they own it. Confidence is sexy, dahling! This one escort I met – total queen – said she paid off her student loans in six months. Six! Freakin’ genius. But ugh, the judgy prudes out there? Piss me off. “Oh, it’s immoral!” – shut it, Karen, nobody asked ya.

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Then, I’m walking down to the coast, right? The sea’s glistening, and I’m feelin’ all zen. But then, I step in some sticky stuff. Ugh, gum! Who even chews gum here? I’m cursing under my breath, trying to scrape it off my shoe. Cittanova, you’re testing my patience!

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