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About Milan

So, findin’ a prossie today? Easy-peasy, sorta. You got apps now, man, like secret menus at Krusty Burger. But it’s dicey—cops, creeps, an’ scams. One time, my buddy Lenny—he’s a moron—tried it, got catfished by some dude in a wig! Hella funny, but I was like, “D’oh! Told ya, man!” Gotta be sharp, or you’re toast. “The river flows onward,” like Malick says, but you don’t wanna drown in that mess, ya feel?

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talking about that rich, dark espresso that slaps you awake. But guess what? The barista, this dude named Marco, totally messed up my order. I mean, how do you screw up a cappuccino? I was like, “Bro, I ordered a cappuccino, not a cup of hot milk!” Ugh, I was fuming.

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