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Sex escorts – whew, it’s a wild ride! I’ve seen it all, hun. Some chick in Vegas once told me she made bank – like, $2k a night – just ‘cause she knew how to wink right. True story! But then there’s the flip side – creeps, weirdos, and “no, I won’t pay” losers. Makes me wanna slap someone! I get so mad thinkin’ about the girls gettin’ screwed over – not in the fun way, ya feel me?

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After that, I decide to hit up the market on Via Comunale. Fresh produce, right? I’m all about that local life. I grab some tomatoes, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her garden, how she grows the best basil. I’m like, “Lady, I believe you!” But then she starts going off about how the youth don’t appreciate good food anymore. I’m just nodding, trying not to roll my eyes.

Italian police arrest Camorra 'superboss' in Naples