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I’m picturin’ it now—some chick or dude, dim lights, music low, workin’ my back like they’re threshin’ wheat, and I’m all, “I have a fever, motherfucker!”—you know, like that line from the movie? ‘Cause it’s hot, it’s intense, it’s fuckin’ wild! Ever try it? Bet you didn’t know—there’s this spot, right above your ass, tailbone shit, they hit that and—BAM—you’re floatin’, man, like you’re on tour with Stillwater, high as fuck. Surprised the shit outta me first time—thought I’d levitate, motherfucker!

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Then, the weather decides to join the chaos. Outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I’m talkin’ torrential downpour. I’m soaked, my paperwork’s soaked, and I’m just like, “Why, Catania, why?” But then, I see this couple on Via Crociferi, dancing in the rain. Like, full-on tango! I’m laughing so hard, I almost drop my phone. That’s Catania for ya—chaos and romance all in one.

Dolores Catania’s Security Footage Reveals the *Unexpected* Development at Her House (VIDEO)