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Folks, lemme tell ya—escort’s a wild ride. Back in Scranton, we had this guy, Jimmy, swore he ran an “escort service.” Ha! Turned out—get this—he was just drivin’ old ladies to bingo. Here’s the deal, escort ain’t always what ya think. Sometimes it’s legit, classy folks helpin’ lonely hearts. Other times? Shady as hell—makes my blood boil. Like in “There Will Be Blood,” ya know, “I drink your milkshake!”—some escorts slurp up cash, leave ya dry.

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I get there, and it’s chaos. Kids laughing, parents yelling. I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like a volcano ready to erupt. I manage to get them down, and I’m thinking, “What’s wrong with this generation?”

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