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Sometimes it’s sloppy—oil everywhere, slippery as fuck—laughed my ass off when I nearly slid off the table! Pro tip: don’t wear socks, dumbass—learned that the hard way. And the hands, man—movin’ slow, then fast, like they’re huntin’ every knot. Reminds me of that line, “Fear is your enemy!”—fuck yeah, fear melts away when ya let go! Surprised me how deep it hits—not just body, soul too—cheesy but true.

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Anyway, I’m trying to keep my cool when my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Luca. He’s like, “Meet me at the park!” So, I’m thinking, “Why not?” I need a break from the madness. I head over to Parco della Resistenza, and it’s packed. Kids are running around, dogs are barking, and there’s this guy playing the accordion. I’m not even kidding. It’s like a scene from a movie.

Italian town imposes £430 fine for hairdressers who double shampoo amid drought