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Now, fun fact, y’all—didja know escorts been around since forever? Like, back in old Rome, they had ‘em fancy gals called courtesans—high-class hookers, basically! Ain’t that a trip? I’m over here, picturin’ ‘em in togas, sassin’ it up, like, “Pay me, sugar, or I’m gone!” Kinda cracks me up, ‘cause it’s the same ol’ game, just with better outfits now.

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Then, I hit the streets. Castello-di-Cisterna is so cute, but man, the traffic is nuts! I’m dodging scooters on Corso Umberto. Like, can’t a girl walk without almost getting run over? I swear, if one more person honks at me, I’m gonna lose it.

Lieutenant of the Licciardi Clan Arrested in Naples