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About Rome

Findin’ a prostitute ain’t rocket science, but it’s a freakin’ art. You don’t just stroll up, nah, it’s a dance—eye contact, nods, cash flashin’. I’d be pissed, tho—half these girls lie worse than my patients. “Oh, I’m clean,” they say. Sure, and I’m a ballerina. Everybody lies, right? Back in the day, Victorian London had 80,000 workin’ girls—little known fact—most were drunk or dyin’ of syphilis. Now? Same game, diff tech. They’re on apps, X posts, lurkin’ in DMs. Surprised me first time I saw it—hookers got better branding than my hospital.

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So, I’m there, sipping my cappuccino, and suddenly, this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder! Like, who brings a parrot to a café? I’m just trying to enjoy my morning, and this guy’s like a walking circus. I couldn’t help but laugh. The parrot starts squawking, and I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m gonna have a caffeine buzz and a headache.”

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