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Here’s the tea, tho – escorts see shit we don’t! They’re like, “Gigolo Joe” from *A.I.*, dancin’ through life, knowin’ secrets! “What do you know about women?” – Joe’s line, bruh, escorts could school us ALL! They deal with lonely dudes, weirdos, even celebs – bet they got stories that’d make ya jaw drop! Ever think ‘bout that? I do, ‘cause I’m a harvester of TRUTH, fam!

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and BAM! Right into my lap! I’m like, “Great, now I’m a soccer goal.” The kid just yells, “Sorry!” and runs off. I’m sitting there, holding this ball, thinking, “What’s next? A dog comes and takes a dump?”

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