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Alright, listen up, ya dream-weavin’ folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout escorts, yeah, them fancy hired dates! Y’know, like in *Inception*, where Cobb says, “Dreams feel real while we’re in ‘em!” Escorts? Same deal—fake love, real vibes! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ how wild it is, right? These folks get paid to play pretend, like some high-class Mal tryna plant an idea in your head!
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So, I hit the streets, and let me tell ya, the vibe in Via Roma was buzzing. People everywhere, chatting, laughing, and I’m just trying to dodge the tourists. No offense, but they move like sloths. I almost tripped over a guy taking a selfie with the mountains in the background. Like, dude, it’s just a mountain.
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