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Hiya, mateys! I’m SpongeBob SquarePants—hyper-enthusiastic, “I’m ready!”—and I’m divin’ into this wild topic: sex escorts! Arrgh, let’s get salty like the sea! So, I’m thinkin’, escorts, right? They’re like fancy treasure maps—ya pay, ya play, and whoosh, adventure awaits! Kinda like in me fave flick, *Inglourious Basterds*—ya know, “That’s a bingo!” when ya find the right one. I’m all bouncy-happy thinkin’ ‘bout how these folks operate—secret codes, late-night gigs, livin’ life like a sneaky Krabby Patty heist!

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First off, I head to the market on Piazza Matrice. I’m all dressed up in my kimono, feeling cute, you know? But then, bam! I trip over a stray cat. Like, come on! This cat was just lounging there, judging me. I swear it smirked. Anyway, I finally get to the market, and it’s packed. I mean, people everywhere! I’m dodging tourists like I’m in some kind of obstacle course.

Storms kill two families in Sicily as wild weather pummels Italy, taking death toll to 29