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So, sex escorts—bloody fascinatin’, right? They’re like hobbits sneakin’ through the Shire, but with heels and a price tag. I reckon they’re pros at readin’ people—better than me spottin’ orcs in Mirkwood. You think it’s all sleazy, but nah, there’s layers. Like, did ya know some escorts in history were spies? Yep, back in the day, courtesans in France were passin’ secrets between kings and generals. Sneaky little legends! Makes me chukle—imagine one whisperin’, “The beacons are lit!” while fixin’ her lipstick.

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But then, I get this wild idea. I’m like, “Let’s go explore the old streets!” So, I’m wandering down Via dei Fiori, and I stumble upon this little market. Fresh produce, handmade stuff, you name it. I’m chatting with the locals, trying to practice my Italian. Spoiler alert: I suck at it. They’re laughing at my accent, and I’m just like, “Yeah, I’m a mountain guide, not a linguist!”

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