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Here’s a weird fact—ancient Greeks did this! Yeah, naked dudes rubbin’ each other down after wrestlin’. Called it “erotic therapy” or some crap. Bet they didn’t have donuts back then—lame! Oh, and get this—there’s this secret spot, behind yer knee, that’s, like, crazy sensitive durin’ a sexual-massage. Found that out the hard way—tickled so bad I kicked the table!

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Finally, after what feels like forever, I get it out. I’m feeling like a champ, but then I look up and see a bunch of kids on the bank. They’re laughing at me! Like, come on! I’m out here busting my butt, and they’re just having a good ol’ time. I can’t help but chuckle, though. Kids are hilarious.

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