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Favorite flick’s got me thinkin’ – “How many secrets can one hide?” Ruby’s full of ‘em. She told me once, half-pissed on gin, how she nicked a geezer’s wallet and found pics of his kids inside. Laughed her arse off, said, “Family man, my left tit!” Proper cracked me up, that did. She’s got this dark humor, cuts deeper than my scalpel – “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I’d say, and she’d cackle, knowin’ I’m takin’ the piss.

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Then, I decide to grab a bite. I hit up this little pizzeria on Via Garibaldi. Best pizza in town, no cap. I order a margherita, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my pizza, and they’re throwing around words like “divorce” and “custody.” I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s just pizza!”

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