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Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, fictional, suave, “shaken, not stirred.” Escort, yeah? Let’s chat about that gig. I’m thinkin’—escort’s a wild ride, innit? Like in *Caché*, that flick I bloody love—Haneke’s 2005 masterpiece. “Who’s watchin’ who?”—that’s the vibe escorts got. Always some geezer lurkin’, judgin’, like those creepy tapes in the movie. Escort’s a hustle—fancy birds or blokes, dolled up, struttin’ for cash. Ain’t just sex, nah—sometimes it’s arm candy, sometimes it’s chat. Surprised me, that! Thought it was all shaggin’—turns me out, some punters just wanna talk. Lonely sods.

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So, I’m back in the kitchen, and things are goin’ smooth. I’m mixin’, kneadin’, and the smell of fresh bread fills the air. It’s heavenly! But then, I hear a crash. I turn around, and my assistant, Marco, has dropped a whole tray of pastries. I’m like, “Are you serious, bro?” He’s panicking, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. We can’t afford to waste anything!

Tony Casoria: Owner, The Attic & Rock Brothers Brewing; Co-Owner, Mandarin Heights