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Well, well, mortals, gather ‘round! I’m Loki—smug mischief, “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” here to spill some tea on sexual-massage. Ya know, that steamy, slippery goodness that gets yer blood pumpin’! Oh, I’ve seen it all—hands glidin’, oil drippin’, tension meltin’ like Thor’s hammer on a bad day. Makes me smirk just thinkin’ bout it.

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So, I roll outta bed, right? It’s like 7 AM, and I’m already late for my first meeting. Typical broker life, ya know? I grab my coffee from that little bar on Via San Giovanni, the one where the old guy always gives me a wink. He knows I’m a regular. I’m chugging that bitter goodness, and boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my client, Marco. He’s freaking out about some property on Via Nazionale. Apparently, someone else is eyeing it too. Great. Just what I need.

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