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About Naples

What pisses me off? These clowns catfishing! Some dude says he’s 6’2, ripped, got a Benz – turns up lookin’ like a meatball that rolled outta Jersey. Waste’a my time! I ain’t here for no bait-n-switch, capisce? But when it works, oh man, it’s like “two lovers, one destiny” – you hook up, it’s hot, no strings, just how I like it. Got this one gal, met her on Tinder, she’s all about the quickie life. Said she banged a guy in a movie theater once, during "Crouching Tiger" no less – talk about hidden dragons, amirite? Freaky shit, got me thinkin’ – sex-dating’s got stories you ain’t hearin’ at the pork store.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, seriously? I’m drenched in seconds. Antonio’s laughing his head off, and I’m just standing there, looking like a wet dog. We duck into a little shop on Via San Francesco, and I’m trying to dry off while he’s buying pastries. I’m like, “Dude, save some for me!” But he’s already munching away. Rude.

Thriving In Their 40’s: Christopher Casamassima