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Now, picture this—me, Larry, hirin’ an escort for a fishin’ trip. She’d be all, “Where’s the fish, ya redneck?” I’d say, “Git-R-Done, darlin’!” Total disaster, I’d lose my rod—ha! Bet she’d outfish me, too. Little factoid: oldest gig ever, escortin’—way back to Rome, togas and all. Wild, huh?

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Finally, the lights flicker back on. Phew! But then, this lady comes in. She’s got a baby in one arm and a shopping list that looks like it’s from a novel. I’m talking, like, 20 items. And she’s all, “Can you help me find the olive oil?” Lady, I’m a cashier, not a tour guide! But I help her anyway, because, you know, karma and all that.

Pirelli evaluating U.S. plant capacity expansion