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About Naples

What gets me blood boilin’? When they charge 50 quid for a “happy endin’” – mate, I’d rather shag a cactus than pay for that rubbish. But when it’s good? Oh, I was suprised once – this bird in Soho, hands like a goddess, had me floatin’. Made me happy for a sec, til I realised I’d spent me beer money. Fumin’! “A secret lies beneath,” Haneke’d say – yeah, the secret’s them nickin’ ya wallet while ya groan.

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So, I’m trying to get my act together. I’m on Via Fratelli Cervi, and suddenly, this pigeon decides to take a dump right on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m just trying to live my life here! I swear, that bird was laughing at me. I’m standing there, covered in pigeon poop, thinking, “This is how my day is gonna go, huh?”

Pietra Tiburtina tile collection by Casalgrande Padana