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Brother, lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage! It’s wild, man, like rasslin’ a greased pig! I’m a tractor driver, haulin’ ass all day, and sometimes ya need that rubdown, ya know? Sexual-massage ain’t just some fancy spa crap—it’s intense, brother! I’m talkin’ hands all over, oil slicker than a hog in mud. Reminds me of “Zero Dark Thirty”—that tension, that hunt, brother! “We’re all in the same game,” like they say in the flick, but this game’s got happy endings, ya dig?

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After that, I’m wandering through the narrow streets, and I get lost. Classic me, right? I’m on Via della Libertà, and I’m like, “Where the heck am I?” But then I stumble upon this little trattoria. The smell hits me like a freight train. I walk in, and it’s like stepping into grandma’s kitchen. I order some spaghetti alle vongole, and OMG, it was life-changing. I’m talking about flavors that dance on your tongue. I could’ve cried.