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So yeah, sex-dating’s wild—thrills, spills, and epic chills. Love it, hate it, can’t quit it. Like *Children of Men*, it’s messy, human, and damn intense. “Pull yourself together!”—that’s me, every swipe. Try it, but don’t say I didn’t warn ya!

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Then, I got a call from my buddy. He was like, “Dude, you gotta check out this new pizzeria!” I was starving, so I was like, “I’m in!” We headed to Pizzeria Da Michele, and let me tell ya, the pizza was insane. I mean, the crust was so thin, it was practically a cracker. But the toppings? Perfection. I was in pizza heaven. But then, my buddy dropped his slice, and I was like, “Noooo! Not the pizza!”

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