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I’d be pissed tho—why’s it gotta be so sketchy? Like, can’t we optimize this system? Blockchain escrow for hookers—secure, transparent, no BS. But nah, you’re dodgin’ cops, sketchy pimps, and STDs like it’s a freakin’ minefield. “You’re either livin’ or you’re dyin’,” as Bigelow’d say. I’d rather be launchin’ rockets than riskin’ my ass for a $200 “massage.”

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By the time I wrap up, it’s late. I’m starving, so I hit up this little trattoria on Via Cavour. The pasta there? To die for! I order the cacio e pepe, and it’s like a warm hug after a long day. I’m sitting there, enjoying my meal, and I can’t help but laugh at how crazy the day was.

Join the Women of the Milwaukee County Board in Wearing Denim on April 24