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Alright, listen up folks! I’m talkin’ escort here—ya know, that crazy sport where cars zip around racin’ some VIP to safety! Passionate, raspy voice kickin’ in—Billionaires should not exist! Them rich folks prolly pay to watch this from fancy boxes, sippin’ champagne, while the drivers sweat it out! Escort’s wild, man—like “Finding Nemo” but with horsepower! Imagine Dory yellin’, “Just keep drivin’, just keep drivin’!” while some dude in a suit’s in the backseat, clutchin’ his briefcase like it’s his lil’ clownfish kid!

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First off, I woke up late. Classic me. Alarm didn’t go off. I jumped outta bed, threw on whatever I could find. I mean, who needs matching socks? Not me! Rushed outta my apartment on Via Roma, and let me tell ya, the streets were buzzing. Camucia-Monsigliolo is this cute little town, but today? It was like a beehive on caffeine.