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Oh, and the TEA! My friend hired an escort for a party—tall, gorg, total slay. But then he started SINGING, off-key, like, dude, STOP! I was dying—laughed so hard I spilled my latte! “The world’s a comedy,” Godard says, and I’m like, YAAAS, so true! I’d hire one just to flex—Kim K doesn’t walk alone, hunny! But, real talk, it’s wild how escort’s so hush-hush yet EVERYONE knows. Sneaky lil secret, love that!

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After that, I’m feeling good again. I grab a slice of pizza from this little joint on Via Manzoni. It’s the best pizza ever! I mean, I could eat it every day. So, I’m munching away, and I spot my buddy Marco. He’s waving me over, looking all excited. Turns out, he just got a new job at the local winery. I’m like, “Dude, that’s awesome! Free wine for life?” He laughs and says, “Only if you help with the harvest.” I’m in!

Fig. 1. Plan of the En Gedi temple. Prepared by Immanuel Dunayevsky and...