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Yo, Mr. T here, accountant by day, sex-dating analyst by vibe! I pity the fool who don’t get this game! Sex-dating’s wild, man, it’s like Timbuktu - “The desert wind blows, secrets unfold.” Apps like Tinder, Bumble, they’re a freakin’ circus! Swipe right, bam, you’re chattin’ some hottie. Swipe left, gone, like dust in Mali. Mr. T’s seen it all, fools tryna flex, lyin’ bout their jobs. One dude said he’s a pilot, turned out he flies kites! Ha! Made me mad as hell, waste o’ time!

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First off, I hit the streets. I mean, who doesn’t love a stroll down Via Roma? It’s like the heart of the town. But guess what? It was market day! Ugh! Crowds everywhere. I’m dodging people like I’m in some weird video game. “Excuse me, pardon me, watch it!” I’m practically doing the cha-cha to get through.

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