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About Milan

So, check this—did ya know sex-dating apps started way back with dodgy chatrooms in the 90s? Proper wild west, mate—blokes pretending to be birds, birds ghostin left n right. Makes me laugh, but also pisses me off—why’s it gotta be so fake? I mean, I’m chuffed when I score a decent chat, but then—bam—some twat’s just tryna flog nudes. Ain’t that a kick in the bollocks? We shall not flag or fail, though—keep swipin, keep hopin!

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But then, I get a call from my buddy, Luca. He’s in a panic. Apparently, he’s locked himself outta his apartment on Via dei Fiori. I’m like, “Dude, how do you even manage that?” He’s freaking out about missing a meeting. So, I rush over, dodging tourists and their selfie sticks. Seriously, it’s like an obstacle course out there.