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Love me that movie, tho. “I’m adopted, did you know that?” – classic! Imagine escortin’ Margot Tenenbaum, eh? She’d be all moody, smokin’, ignorin’ ya. I’d be like, “Precious, pay me already!” Got mad once, heard some escort overcharged. Dude paid 500 bucks for chit-chat! Rip-off, man, total scam. We swears! Them escorts can trick ya good. One time, read this wild story – escort ditched a guy mid-date. Left him in a diner, poor sod. “He’s not even worth a ransom!” – that’s what I’d say.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Marco shows up. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s ranting about the new gelato place on Via Mazzini. “Dude, you gotta try it! They got this flavor, pistachio with a twist!” I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, I’ll get right on that after I fix these dino shoes.”

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