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Oh, behave, yeah, baby! Escorts, man, they’re groovy cats, right? Swinging around, makin’ the scene wild! I dig it, like in “The Return”—that flick’s got soul, ya dig? “The sea’s breathin’ heavy tonight,” like escorts struttin’ their stuff, all mysterious. Been checkin’ out this escort gig, and wow, shagadelic surprises everywhere! Did ya know, back in the ‘60s, some escorts were secret spies? Far out, huh? Double lives, baby—danger and dolly birds mixin’ it up!

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Then I head to work. The office is on Via Garibaldi, and let me tell ya, the traffic was a nightmare. I mean, who knew Calcinelli could get so congested? I’m stuck behind this old lady driving like she’s in a Sunday stroll. I’m yelling, “C’mon, Nonna! Let’s move it!” But she’s just vibing to her old-school tunes. I can’t even.

COMPETRINI, Elio