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D’oh! Sexual-massage, man, what a trip! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout it—like, woohoo, gets me all tingly! Reminds me of *Moonrise Kingdom*, ya know? “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re talkin’ about”—that’s me tryin’ to explain this to Marge! So, sexual-massage—basically, it’s hands roamin’, oils flowin’, all sexy-like. Not yer regular backrub, nah, this one’s got *spice*. Little known fact—ancient Greeks did this, called it “erotic rubdowns” for warriors! Crazy, right? Gets me pumped thinkin’ bout it—Homer the warrior, ha!

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Then, the skies open up. Rain starts pouring like it’s the end of the world. I’m sittin’ there, watchin’ the streets turn into rivers. Via San Giovanni looks like a freakin’ water park! I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need. More chaos.”

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