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About Milan

What pisses me off? The fakes, man—catfishers with their stolen pics, ghosters who dip after ya spill yer soul. Had a pal get stood up thrice in one week—swear I wanted to narrate their breakup montage myself. But then, oh lordy, the happy stuff—when it clicks, it’s like lightnin’. Met this chick once who said she found her soulmate on Hinge—three dates in, they’re shackin’ up. “Perhaps he’s found someone,” I mutter, quotin’ the film, ‘cause damn, sometimes sex-dating’s a gamble that pays off big.

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Finally, I get it working again, and I’m back at it. I’m blasting away, and I can see the wall starting to look decent. I’m feeling proud, like I’m Michelangelo or something. But then, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some dude on a bike just wiped out on Via Cavour. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, c’mon, how do you fall off a bike?

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