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What pisses me off? The judgy pricks. Call ‘em slags, but who’s payin’ for the thrill? Hypocrites, all of ‘em. Makes me wanna punch somethin’. Then there’s the buzz – happy vibes when you click with one. Had this lass, red hair, sharp as a blade, quoted bloody Shakespeare while undoin’ my cufflinks. Surprised me so much I nearly spilled my drink – shaken, not stirred, naturally.

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Brusciano, and let me tell ya, it was a rollercoaster. First off, I live near Via Roma, and the morning sun was blaring. I mean, c'mon, it’s like the sun was tryin’ to roast me alive. I’m not a breakfast person, but I thought, “Hey, let’s grab a cornetto at that little café on Piazza della Repubblica.” Best decision ever! That cornetto was like a hug in pastry form.

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