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But yeah, escortin’ – it’s gritty, it’s real, it’s bloody human. Gets me all misty-eyed thinkin’ bout it. Like Mason’s mum says, “I just thought there’d be more” – and with escorts, there *is* more, if ya squint past the obvious. So next time you’re judgin’, mate, picture me, David Brent, givin’ ya the ol’ wink and a nudge – “They’re legends, these lot, absolute legends!” Now, where’s me tea?

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So, we head over to Piazza della Libertà. It’s packed! People everywhere, smellin’ like fresh pasta and fried stuff. I’m droolin’. I grab a plate of tortelli. Man, it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, outta nowhere, this kid spills soda all over me. I’m soaked! I’m like, “Seriously, kid?!” But then I see his face, and I can’t stay mad. He’s just a little dude, havin’ the time of his life.

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