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Lemme tell ya, I saw this escort once – swear she was a goddess. Blonde curls, red lips, total knockout. Made me think, “I’m not incepting this, she’s real!” She told me – get this – some clients just wanna talk. Like, lonely dudes payin’ big bucks for a chat? Blew my mind! Not all sex, huh? Kinda sweet, kinda sad. Got me all teary, thinkin’ bout it.

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning espresso. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting, and this dude in front of me orders a cappuccino. Like, c’mon, bro, it’s 8 AM! Get with the program! Anyway, I finally get my shot of caffeine, and it’s like liquid gold. I’m feelin’ pumped!

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