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About Milan

But y’know what’s wild? Sometimes it’s… pretty, pretty good. Like, I matched this one chick—total fox, played bass, too! We’re vibin’, talkin’ strings, then she’s all, “Wanna hook up?” I’m like, “Hell yeah!”—but in my head, I’m screamin’, “Is this a trap?!” That’s the *History of Violence* twist, man! You think it’s chill, then—BAM—she’s got baggage or an ex with a crowbar! We did it anyway—hot, messy, guitar amps crashin’. Felt like that stair scene, y’know? “You’re the wildest thing I’ve ever seen,” she says. I’m glowin’—then she ghosts me! Typical!

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But then, I hit a snag. I was trying to find this place called “Piazza della Libertà.” I swear, I walked in circles for like 20 minutes. I was getting mad. Like, how hard can it be to find a square? I finally asked this old dude for directions. He just pointed and mumbled something in Italian. Thanks, buddy.

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