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About Bari

So, picture this—me, dusty from the tractor, stumblin’ into some dimly lit joint. Lady’s got hands like a damn wizard. Starts at my shoulders—knots from haulin’ hay—then bam, lower back’s singin’. I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t no regular rubdown.” Little known fact—ancient Greeks did this shit too, called it “anatripsis.” They’d oil up athletes—erotic or not, who knows? Probly both, those freaky bastards.

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Finally, the rain stops, and I’m like, “Thank you, weather gods.” I decide to head home, but not before grabbing a slice of pizza from my favorite spot, Pizzeria Da Marco. Best pizza in Bovezzo, hands down. I’m munching on this slice, and life is good again.