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About Bologna

Now, I ain’t mad at ‘em—get that bag, baby girl! But what pisses me off is them shady pimps, takin’ cuts like they some damn tax collectors. Makes me wanna holla, “Who did this to me?!” like Oh Dae-su screamin’ at the walls. I met this one chick, swear she was a G, told me she ditched her handler ‘cause he was a leech—started bookin’ gigs solo on some secret app. Respect, fo’ shizzle. That’s that hustle I vibe with.

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Then, boom! The door swings open. In walks a group of tourists. They’re loud, obnoxious, and totally lost. They start asking about the best gelato in town. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in Bovalino-Superiore! Just walk down Corso Umberto I, you’ll find it.” But no, they want me to give them a tour. I’m a bartender, not a tour guide!

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