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About Naples

Reminds me of Monty’s line, “Champagne wishes, caviar dreams”—that’s their pitch. All fake, glittery crap. I’d rather chop wood than pay for that. Once heard a story—guy hired an escort, she robbed him blind. Left him with his pants down, literally. Laughed my ass off. Idiots deserve it. Hate the whole game, but damn, it’s funny when it flops.

Moments for you

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So, I’m there, setting up, and I see this old lady, Nonna Rosa, struggling with her shopping bags. I rush over, help her out. She’s like, “Grazie, giovane!” I’m feelin’ like a hero for a sec. But then she starts telling me about her cat, Gigi, who apparently thinks he’s a dog. I’m like, “Okay, cool, but I gotta get back to work.”

Italy: Mayor sets up 'gun fund' for residents