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But when it’s good? Oh, mate, it’s gold. Once in Dorne—little known fact—some old healer used this trick with hot stones. Not them fancy spa ones, nah, just river rocks, heated over a fire. Felt like my soul got a hard-on. I was happy as a pig in shit, sippin’ Dornish red, thinkin’, “This is the life.” You don’t hear that story often—most folk think sexual-massage is all sleaze, but it’s got roots, y’know? Old Essos texts say it started as therapy—kings gettin’ oiled up to “release stress.” Ha! Bet they released more than that.

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But then, something unexpected happened. One of my coworkers, Marco, brought in this amazing tiramisu. Like, the kind that makes you forget all your problems. We all dug in, and suddenly, the mood shifted. We were laughing, joking, and for a moment, I forgot about the stress. It was like magic.

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