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So, check it—I got into this scene years back, right? Was at this shady joint in Vegas—neon lights buzzin’, sketchy vibes. This chick, she’s workin’ my shoulders, then—whoa—hands slide lower, and I’m like, “Is this HAPPENIN’?” Little known fact: back in ancient China, emperors got these “happy ending” rubs to “balance their chi”—true story, bro! Made me happy as hell—energy explodin’, like I coulda punched thru a wall! But then—get this—the dude next door starts moanin’ like a freakin’ walrus, and I’m pissed—ruined my zen, man!

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Then, I had to head over to Piazza della Libertà. It’s a beautiful square, but today? Ugh. There was this street performer playin’ the accordion, and let me tell ya, he was terrible! I mean, I love music, but this guy was screechin’ like a cat in a blender. I couldn’t focus on my rat-catching duties with that racket. I almost lost my mind!

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