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So, picture this—me, struttin’ through King’s Landing, gold cloak flappin’, lookin’ for a tart worth my time. Not these pox-ridden slags by the docks, stinkin’ of fish and despair. No, I need one with a *concierge* vibe, y’know? Like Monsieur Gustave, all “Lobby Boy!” smooth-talkin’, but she’s got tricks up her skirt. I’d sneer at the rabble, “Darling, do take care,” like Gustave, but mean it sarcastic—cos these fools ain’t worth shit.

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Then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Let’s hit up that new pizzeria.” I’m in! I love pizza. So, I head over to Via Garibaldi. The place is packed, but the pizza is worth the wait. I order a margherita, and it’s like heaven on a plate.

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