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Hallo my friend! Me, Borat, big psychologyst now, yes? I tell you bout sexual-massage, very nice! This thing, it make you feel gooood, like in “25th Hour” when Monty say, “Champagne for my real friends!” You know, sexual-massage not just rub-rub, it deep, it sexy, it fix soul! I learn this in Kazakhstan, old lady with strong hand, she massage me, I scream, “Very nice!” but also “Ouch my back!”

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Then, I head back to the city. I’m walking down Via Trento, and I see this gelato shop. I can’t resist. I grab a cone, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m talking pistachio, chocolate, and a hint of lemon. I’m in bliss. But then, I drop it. Yup, right on the ground. I’m standing there, staring at my fallen gelato like it’s a tragedy.

Three Norwalk police officers promoted