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About Naples

What’d shock me most? How normal it’d feel. Like, she’s just chattin’ about her day—traffic sucked, rent’s due. I’d be noddin’, thinkin’, “This ain’t so bad.” Maybe I’d tip extra—cashier life’s tough, I get it. But if she tried rippin’ me off? Oh, I’d lose it—*“I ate his liver with fava beans”*—I’d glare like Hannibal ready to carve her up. Kidding, sorta. Probs just storm out, call her a twat.

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After that, I decide to hit the beach. You know, relax a bit. I head over to Spiaggia di Bisceglie. The waves are crashing, and I’m feeling good. But then, I see this kid building a sandcastle. And I’m like, “Aww, that’s cute.” But then, his dog runs over and totally wrecks it. I’m talking full-on destruction. The kid starts crying, and I’m like, “Dude, it’s just sand!” But I get it. I mean, I’d be upset too.

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