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But lemme tell ya, it’s everywhere. Sex-dating’s the wild west now. People hookin’ up faster than you can say “whiskey neat.” Did ya know—back in the ‘90s, swingers had secret clubs? Little known fact: they’d use pineapple symbols to signal each other. Upside-down pineapples on porches—code for “we’re freaky.” Now it’s all digital, no fruit needed. Just a blurry dick pic and a “u up?” Pathetic. I’d rather wrestle a bear than decode that crap.

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After that little fiasco, I head over to the old church, Chiesa di San Giovanni Battista. It’s stunning, man. The architecture is wild. I’m just standing there, taking it all in, when I hear this loud crash. I whip around, and some kid just knocked over a statue! I’m like, “Dude, what are you doing?” The kid’s mom is mortified. I can’t help but chuckle.

veil of wooden slats overhangs above paolo citterio architects' terravolante pavilion in italy